Edifying vs hurtful
People are going to be people no matter what. We cannot expect people that do not know God to act any better then how they do. The behavior of the common man goes from purely evil to good hearted. Most of us pretty much understand that idea that the common man will behave the way they do and it should not surprise us; we should be able to endure or tolerate it. Words are the things that weigh most in life. Solomon suggests that gentle words brings life, but harsh crush the spirit (pr15:4). So, even the common person’s words will have some effect in our lives, but we should not allow them to affect us; because we know who they are. Evil words, Solomon said, destroys friends (prv11:9) depending who speaks them.
Psalms 55:20-22
My companion attacks his friends; he violates his covenant. 21 His talk is smooth as butter, yet war is in his heart; his words are more soothing than oil, yet they are drawn swords. 22 Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken.
We do not expect those that are from the family of God to speak things that hurtful, it is not common; it should not exist. And, words that come from an un expected source catches of guard. David was confronted with the reality that his closes companion; his son Absalom, betrayed him. It was the hardest thing he went through, because Absalom was his son. But, the hardest thing David was dealing with was that his most closest companion; Ahithophel, betrayed him. His words were like soothing butter (prv16:24), they carried the tone of betrayal and deceit; he was not expecting this. The words of Ahithophel made David feel good, but the thought that he was betraying was like a sword piercing the heart (prv25:18).
David was heavily hearted because of Ahithophel’s betrayal, and so he writes that we should cast our burdens on God Words become burdens on the heart and that is why the Apostle Paul tells us that no corrupt communication should come out of our mouths, but only that which is for edifying (Ep4:29). Jesus said come unto me all that are burdened and heavily hearted and he would give you rest (Mt11:28-29). Burdens cause anxiety and the build up of words; not edifying betraying and destructive ones. The Apostle Peter tells us to cast our anxieties upon him (1pt5:7).
The soothing tongue is a tree of life, but a perverse tongue crushes the spirit.
With their mouths the godless destroy their neighbors, but through knowledge the righteous escape.
Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones
Like a club or a sword or a sharp arrow is one who gives false testimony against a neighbor.
29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.
7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.